February 25, 2004
GENTLEMEN, START YOUR QUESTIONS
One of the worst interviews I've ever heard took place the other night when Larry King simultaneously interviewed NASCAR drivers Dale Earnhardt Jr. and Jeff Gordon.
These two guys are extremely intelligent. Maybe King thought he had to talk down to them because it was NASCAR, but he asked some of the dumbest questions possible. Like this exchange:
KING: Do you drive, Dale, because your father drove?
EARNHARDT JR.: Well, I think -- yes, I guess so. I mean, if he were a plumber, I'd probably be a plumber, but...
Hey, Larry, are you a talk show host because your father had a mouth?
Jesus H. Christ.
Then there was this doozy:
KING: Where were you when he died?
EARNHARDT JR.:I was about 100 feet, probably about -- actually, yes, 100 feet ahead of him on the racetrack.
KING: So you knew about it right soon after, right?
EARNHARDT JR.: Yes, it wasn't too long after that.
Uh, Larry. They've got radios in their helmets. It wasn't exactly a secret.
Not satisfied at that level of stupidity, King pushes on to the banal:
KING: Jeff, what's the single life like in New York City?
GORDON: I'm not...
KING: Not exactly a NASCAR Hubbub?
GORDON: No, I enjoy New York. I think it's a great city. And it certainly has a lot to offer.
KING: I bet.
GORDON: I'm up here visiting some friends. I might be able to tell you what it's like tomorrow or something, when we go to dinner and hang out. But you know, to me, I think what I love about New York is that I'm just able to go get away and enjoy the things that this city has to offer and feel like I can be just an average person just like anybody else walking down the street.
KING: You been there much, Dale?
EARNHARDT JR.: Yes, I've been in New York a few times myself. I like it. It's all right.
The amount of restraint it took for these guys not to just walk off the air had to be tremendous.
On a side note, I don't want to say that Larry isn't aging gracefully, but I think I know what he's going to look like in a few years:
