SIDE SALAD - Everything crunchy is good.

MASCOTS I HAVE KNOWN

You might recall that a couple weeks ago, my friend Al and I spent a lunch hour hanging out with the Tampa Bay Lightning's mascot, Thunder Bug.

I almost felt bad for the guy. Here he was, a victim of marketing, living on the roof of an auditorium in an effort to sell tickets. It was hot. He was sleeping on a hard floor. It was too sunny to see the TV. We're talking real hardship here. Well, it appears that the plastic wading pool he used for relief was used for other purposes as well.

More power to him, I say. But there's something about the photo that's a little... nasty. This one is almost borderline adult entertainment.

To paraphrase Val Kilmer as "Batman": "It's the bee costume, right? Chicks dig the bee costume."

The full gallery is a crackup. I especially like the shot of the Ice Girl reading TV Guide with extreme concentration.

Got me to thinking about my own brushes with mascots...

It was AOL Broadband Day at Legends Field in Tampa. Who was I to resist a grip-and-grin with the Instant Message Logo Guy.



Once again photography fails to capture the magic generated by an oversize walking cheese stick wearing a sombrero.



While not technically wearing a costume, I would argue that Elvis has become the National Mascot. After William Hung, of course.



Thunder Bug isn't the only one who gets to pose with the Gold and Diamond Source Lightning Girls. But he is the only one who gets to pose with them in their bikinis. Such are the indignities of my life.

But I do have some perks. Like being in the middle of a balanced breakfast and snack mascot shot.