July 07, 2004

THERE BUT FOR
THE GRACE OF GOD
GO MEN EVERYWHERE

Willie Drye, author of Storm of the Century: The Labor Day Hurricane of 1935, passes along this juicy news item:

Luckless Casanova trapped stark naked
Drunken Swede found stuck under a gate calls himself 'fine beef'


OSLO, Norway - Police, ambulance and fire crews rescued a drunken Swede found trapped early Monday without any clothes after he tried to crawl under a gate in downtown Oslo.

The 22-year-old, who insisted upon being addressed as something that sounded like “fine beef” in Swedish, had tried to visit a Norwegian woman at her apartment house in the early hours.

When she refused to let him in, he turned to leave, but found the gate leading to the street from her apartment was locked. He tried to squeeze beneath, but didn’t fit.

So, police said, the young Casanova figured if he slipped off his clothes, he’d probably slip right under the gate.

He was wrong and spent the rest of the night stuck with nothing but the chilly Norwegian night for company.

About four hours later, someone spotted a pair of naked legs sticking out onto the sidewalk from beneath the gate and called the police.

After police and rescue crews were unable to remove him from beneath the gates, they called the fire department, which used a hydraulic jack to lift up the gate. He was freed about 7 a.m.

His rescue was caught on film by a crew of Norwegian journalists and photographers who gathered to watch.

Ever optimistic, the man, whose real name was not released, urged reporters to say he’d gotten stuck while trying to save a kitten. Failing that, he asked them to mention that the object of his affections was “a real stunner.”

Police said the man, who lives in Oslo, wasn’t hurt and was sent home with the recommendation to take a hot shower and a warm nap.

Note to self: When trapped naked under a gate, avoid using lame "kitten" defense.

Posted by Jeff at July 7, 2004 08:07 AM
Comments