November 29, 2005


DebraLaFaveNotEvenTheLeastBitNude.jpg So Debra LaFave has pleaded guilty and been registered as a sex offender. Talk about your bad weeks. But the plea deal keeps her out of doing any hard time. The worst she'll have to do is stay home for a while. Which, you know, is what got her in trouble in the first place.

On the positive side of the cultural ledger, she also has won Nearly Legal magazine's first annual Teacher I'd Most Want to Have Sex With in the Back of a Ford Bronco contest. (Go Debbie, it's yer birfday...!)

Anyway, it got me to thinking about who will be playing her when the movie gets made on WE or O! or Lifetime or any one of the chick channels. The title no doubt: "Too Pretty For Prison."

The perfect actress would exude a stunning visage on the outside while cloaking the tawdry desires lurking within. She'd have to look good in a blue bikini while, logically, riding a motorcycle, as well as demure enough to carry off a wedding scene.

You'd have to believe that she was outwardly pure and lovely while being full of vile and offensive urges, someone duplicitous and sexy and vivacious and evil. She'd be able to display lifeless doll's eyes one moment and a flash of flirtatious energy the next. She'd have porcelain skin and vermicelli-straight hair. She'd be the portrait of a victimized ice queen, and the embodiment of every schoolboy's dream.

The leading contenders, as I see them are...


Jennie Garth


Gwyneth Paltrow


Jaime Pressley


Bea Arthur

You can vote for your favorite here:

Posted by Jeff at November 29, 2005 07:32 AM

Bea is quite demure, and no doubt she'd look hot on a motorcycle.

Posted by: Mike at November 29, 2005 04:24 PM

Am I the only one that is looking forward to seeing Debra LaFave in playboy or hustler or some mag like that? You know she needs the money.

Posted by: Glen at November 29, 2005 04:41 PM
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