SIDE SALAD - Everything crunchy is good.

THEY DON'T CALL IT "THE BEER CAN BUILDING" FOR NOTHING

It's been a little slow on the hurricane front this year. (:::crossing fingers, knocking on wood:::)

That means Willie Drye, author of Storm of the Century: The Labor Day Hurricane of 1935, has a little time to contemplate the random events in the news. Sometimes that involves hush puppies. Sometimes he waxes poetic about Civil War historians. Then again, you never know when a fake urinating penis will grab his attention.

Got a letter today from Willie in Side Salad's North Carolina Doppler 12,000 Weather Bureau. Seems like he's got drinking on his mind:

Guys:

In case you wonder about these kinds of things, Tampa is tied with New Orleans for the distinction of being America's 24th most drunken city, according to MSNBC (I can't help but wonder whether this stat was compiled before or after Katrina, but I guess we'll never know.)

To answer obvious questions about where Tampa stands in the wonderful world of boozing: Milwaukee is numero uno (that fits, Laverne and Shirley did work in a beer factory and the baseball team is called the Brewers). Minneapolis-St. Paul is #2 (a surprise, something I wouldn't have gathered from watching the Mary Tyler Moore Show. Oh, wait, Mr. Grant. I forgot him.). Columbus, Ohio is number 3 (go Buckeyes). Boston is 4th (Cheers to Sam, Carla, Norm, Cliff and the gang), and Austin (Hook-'em-Horns) Texas is 5th.

Tampa is tops among Florida cities, and I guess that should be the local headline for you all. Orlando is #31, and Miami is #33. For more perspective, New York is in between at #32.

The only North Carolina city listed is Charlotte at #34, and I guarantee there are a lot more people in this state besides me who would argue that Charlotte belongs to South Carolina, not us.

The ratings are based on the following criteria: state laws, drinkers, heavy drinkers, binge drinkers, and alcoholism. Beyond that, I don't know how they compiled the rankings because I didn't want to actually read the story and risk clouding up my opinions with facts. You can see it all at this Web page.

So here's to America's 24th-most boozy city. Jane and I will raise a glass to you tomorrow when we have Friday sundowners on the front porch.

Later,

Willie