June 09, 2005

HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME...
ON SECOND THOUGHT, DON'T

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Here's some disturbing news:

NEW YORK … Who would have thought TV viewers would have been intrigued by the idea of Evander Holyfield learning to dance or A Flock of Seagulls and Loverboy singing anything?

ABC's "Dancing With the Stars'' had a surprisingly strong debut last week as a reality-filled summer television season began. The show was seen by 13.5 million viewers, second only to a ""CSI: Crime Scene Investigation'' rerun as the most-watched prime-time program of the week, according to Nielsen Media Research.

NBC's "Hit Me Baby One More Time,'' which took has-been music stars and gave them another chance at the spotlight, ranked No. 17. But it was the week's most popular show among 18-to-49-year-olds, giving slumping NBC its first victory since January in the demographic it once dominated.


As someone who watched "Hit Me" - and I mean every last second of the first show - I can't imagine why it was such a hit...


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It certainly wasn't to see the last remaining bald-yet-ponytailed-and-baseball-hatted seagull in Flock of Seagulls.


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It wasn't so I could witness Mike Reno's tremendous neck wattle. It was so thick, I thought a joey was going to spring out of his mouth while he sang.


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It wasn't to see Reno bobbing around on his boat in a throwback adidas track suit.


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Or to see him point to his hit.


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Or to see him drive around in his last remaining Loverboy headband. (The others are in the Canadian Smithsonian, I understand.)


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I'm sure there was some other reason to watch this trainwreck. Especially when Tiffany was involved.


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But for the life of me, I can't think of a reason.


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No doubt about it. My mind's a total blank.


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Oh yeah. It was to see whether Tiff would do that annoying Prince thing across her eyes with her fingers.

Posted by Jeff at June 9, 2005 07:54 AM | TrackBack
Comments

Looks like gravity has not been kind to Miss Tiffany, if you know what I mean. And what is that, dirt on her wrist? Or a tattoo that looks like dirt?

Posted by: cessna at June 9, 2005 11:11 AM

That would be a wrist tat.

Because, you know, Tiff needs street cred with her thug homies.

Posted by: Jeff at June 9, 2005 02:12 PM

Okay okay o-KAY. I will admit it.

I was a huge Loverboy fan.

Seriously.

I was also 16. Once.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go take a shower. With Drano.

DAMN YOU!

P.S. "Hit Me" is most definitely a tool of the Fat Cat Record Execs. Why? Because I can guaran-damn-tee you that this show will boost sales.

Maybe not of anything BY the Flock o' Seagulls -- but most definitely of the tunes these folks cover (for instance FoS's cover of "On The Way Down" by Ryan Cabrera).

Posted by: Margi at June 9, 2005 05:39 PM

Mike Reno always creeped me out. I liked Loverboy when I was a kid too...just couldn't ever watch any videos....

The "annoying Prince thing across her eyes with her fingers" had me cracking up.

You know..that IS the technical name for that.
:O)

Posted by: jen at June 9, 2005 11:14 PM

Tits be damned, fucking globulious mams, the Knack so rocked tonight!

Posted by: Cupie at June 10, 2005 01:49 AM

When Tiffany came out and started showing off "the girls," it says something, really that all four of us in the room started scratching out our eyes. Including my 9-year-old boy.

Posted by: Jeff at June 10, 2005 05:32 AM

Jeez, I watched the whole thing too. And some of the 2nd one. It's like rubber-necking. I just had to watch. Tiffany, dear god, your a middle-aged mommy: put some clothes on! Raiding a 16-yr-old's wardrobe made her the most pathetic contender. And I *loved* her. At least it's for charity!

Posted by: Sarah at June 12, 2005 03:59 PM
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