THE CARROT CHRONICLES, EPISODE 3
Death has been confirmed. All is lost.
Mitch's Penis Carrot is no more.
Sentiments have been overwhelming. The affection for this carrot is so strong, Al brought in a miniature casket for the thing.
It was a lovely gesture, really. The carrot fit perfectly into the capsule.
We're not sure where to take it from here. Rommie suggested a Viking burial ceremony, in which we'd float it down the Hillsborough River. Someone else mentioned a funeral pyre.
I guess we could always prop it up with a beer, the way they buried that Steelers fan who wanted to be buried in his Barcolounger.
We'll figure out some sort of dignified farewell, I'm sure.
Posted by Jeff at July 21, 2005 08:08 AM
My sympathies, Mitch. I know how much the penis carrot meant to all the the Trib. It is a great loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
I wonder if buried in the ground penis carrot could spring forth new life. Fresh new penis carrots. They could never take the place of the original, though.
My deepest condolences on your great loss. If there is a heaven for penis carrots, I'm sure he's there right now, looking down on us with love.