August 14, 2010
Actual Comic Book Characters Which Never Quite Took Off
[Seriously?]
We have a give-away table at the office where we put swag that is sent to us in promotional packages. Books, CDs, DVDs. Outdated stuff no one will ever use again. Absorbant towels that will never be used to absorb. That sort of thing. I put a lot of cookbooks and other food items I receive. We get so much that we either sell the items a couple times a year in a giant charity silent auction or just give them away.
Occasionally someone will bring in things from home that they don't want and give folks at work a chance to take them if they want. The other day, someone brought in a giant pile of comic books.
Journalists who love comic books.
I know.
It's like the Giza pyramid of geek.
In that pile was a batch of DC Comics' Who's Who issues. I had never seen them before - I was a comic geek as a kid, but nothing of this magnitude. The Who's Who books were like a high school yearbook for the various stars in the DC galaxy. Batman. Superman. The Green Lantern. That sort of thing.
But to fill that galaxy out a bit, the company included some, how shall we say, lesser stars. Ones that come across either as inside jokes or characters drawn because they couldn't think of anything else.
They include:
Looks like Danny DeVito on 'roids.
Who exactly is Little Cheese - The Micro-Mouse?
Follywood? FOLLYWOOD???? Is that the best they could do?
His back story is even more convoluted.
Ah, the dreaded green moon cheese.
Next character!
I love the idea of The Inferior Five.
Wikipedia explains them thusly:
The Inferior Five (or I5) are a parody superhero team that premiered in the DC Comics title Showcase #62 (1966). Created by E. Nelson Bridwell (writer) and Joe Orlando and Mike Esposito (artists), the group was intended as a parody not only of the Fantastic Four, but of all the superhero teams whose members had such great powers that they could have solved any of the crimes put before them singlehandedly. The Five had to work as a team; none of them could have fought crime on their own.
My favorite character from I5? No contest really.
Comic Vine fills in his gaps [all spelling is theirs] :
Awkwardman is super strong, but he is so clumbsy ha almost never has time to use that strength.Awkwardman is the son of Mister Might and Mermaid. He inherited his dad's strength and his mother's sea powers, including the necessity of getting wet from time to time. He ia also incredibly clumsy, hence the name Awkwardman. He is a reluctant member of the team known as the Inferior Five. He would far rather be on a beach somewhere as opposed to acting like a super hero.
Powers
Awkwardman is super strong and can live underwater.
Lord only knows why I identify with him.