To quote John McEnroe: You cannot be Sirius!
Day 1: It's Smeary, the drunken, grease-painted Christmas clown.
Day 2: You know Whipper and Flogger and Spanker and Hits'em.
Day 3: The Santanator.
Day 4: Santanetics.
Day 5: Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!
Day 6: L'Oreal ... because Santa's worth it.
Day 7: He's Mr. Heat Miser.
Day 8: Santa was hung from the chimney with great care.
Day 9: Why is your bag so full, Panty Claus?
Day 10: Fluffer the Vixen.
Day 11: Santa balls.
Day 12: It's fun to stay at the P.O.L.E.