No toys for me this year. I don't even want world peace. And I already have a brand new truck, so I'm set for a while.
All I want for Christmas is for Britney Spears to put on some damn drawers.
She's making me dislike female genitalia.
I need for that to stop, pronto.
PREVIOUS INSTALLMENTS OF
YOUR MOMENT OF BRITNEY
K-Fed cornrows. Bad idea.
Gallery of the Absurd.
Brit and KFed, the ill-advised reality TV series.
Lights, camera, Britney.
Britney wears the glamorous life.
Britney takes a palimony suit.
Something old, something new.
Britney takes a groom. Again.
Britney defends her latest love.
Britney marries a childhood friend. For 50 hours.
Britney swaps spit with the Rosetta Stone of Skank.
Britney poses for photos that make her look even more plastic and lifeless than she already is.
Britney, as she would look if she hit the all-you-can-eat Seafood Lovers Special at Red Lobster every night for six months.
Britney runs a restaurant into the ground.
Britney has an evil twin available for parties.
Britney and George cut a rug.
Britney proves the axiom: Beer affects the way males respond to females.